3 Ways to Walk in Humility

This past weekend, I took a silent retreat on a beautiful little property where life was thriving. The bugs, beetles, flowers, and animals were all singing their songs happily in the summer sun. I had never been there before, and going in, I thought I would use the time in silence to reflect and grieve and process life with the Lord. However, my environment had such an effect on me, that I couldn’t help but pay attention to it. I got caught up in the dance between butterflies, the ripples in the pond, the scent of an old pine tree, the coo of a dove. I couldn’t help but find joy in the moment and in being where I was among so much beauty, designed by our Creator. I felt free to wonder and be in awe in the present moment.

But a few days later, that feeling has worn off. I woke up feeling the same dread that I’ve woken up with on many days; dread of the sadness I’ve endured and sadness I’ve yet to endure. Dread of the pain and process of living. And while that’s a legitimate emotion that should be fully acknowledged and felt and processed, I want to challenge myself and anyone who can relate, with the truth that that feeling is based on an assumption of going through life without God’s presence. Of doing life on our own. But the truth is that God is with me just as much today as He was during my retreat, thus, the feeling is simply unfounded. Not worthless, not shameful, but normal and human. And also, the feeling is robbing me of the full joy of being, here and now. I challenge you and myself to choose to believe the truth that God’s presence is here and provides every reason for joyfulness, even on days when we wake up and don’t feel it’s true. What is true is that He has provided all we could ever need.

Humility is depending on the Lord to provide.

We all encounter this dilemma of choosing between humility and pride, both in the big and small decisions in life. I have discussed an aspect of this before in my post, Dealing with Pride. We all want our way, sometimes overtly and sometimes subconsciously, but beneath it all is the same sinister thing that keeps us from humbly submitting to the Lord and trusting His goodness and provision. This makes us feel distant, can turn into that feeling of dread or worse. This is something that we all deal with and learning to deal with it in healthy and life-giving ways can make all the difference in the very trajectory of our lives. We all are born with pride, it’s the human condition, so we all must learn to handle it when it does wash over or take hold of our perspective. So how do we handle pride in a healthy way that won’t distance our hearts from God further?

1. Remember how God dealt with you kindly even in your worst moments.

An amazing story in the Bible of not only God’s kindness, but the kindness of people for each other is found in the book of Ruth. Kindness is the thread that runs throughout the short four chapters and it goes around the characters like a chain reaction. Kindness and humility go hand in hand. Boaz’s character reflects that of the Lord, who sees our humble loyalty to Him and rewards it with blessing.

Later in the story, Ruth proposes marriage to Boaz, an extremely bold and humble thing to do, as it vulnerably demonstrates her dependence on him. Boaz dealt with her boldness kindly. It is out of a keen awareness and gratitude for God’s kindness that true humility can rise up in our hearts and help us to act in the love that Jesus calls us to. Even when we don’t act in great love as Ruth did here for her mother-in-law Naomi, we can all think of ways the Lord has dealt kindly with us. As Romans 2:4 says, it is God’s kindness that leads us to repentance. Fully owning our worst moments and repenting of our pride is the first step in humility.

2. Decide, once and for all, to pursue genuine change of heart with Jesus.

At some point in our lives, we have to make the choice in faith that God’s way truly is best for us. We all have that decision to make for ourselves, whether His will for the long term is better than getting our way in the short term. There comes a point when we must stop excusing our pride away. At some point we need to acknowledge that anytime and every time that temptation arises, it is never justified to act upon it and follow it if we have committed our lives to following Jesus. We need to recognize it for what it really is, idolatry of the self. By letting our own will rule our perspective, we are placing ourselves in a place only God is righteous, just, and loving enough to fill.

When we are able to own up to our sinful nature, not just a single event or instance, but our heart condition of sin, only then can we fully allow Jesus through the door of our hearts to begin to heal what pride has twisted up in us. When we rely on Jesus with our entire self, we are no longer powerless against pride. We are instead empowered by the Spirit of the Living God to walk in love and humility, even becoming able to truly love our enemies because of God’s love for us while we were still His enemies. This ability is the beautiful and mysterious truth about authentic followers of Jesus. But it doesn’t come easily, and it doesn’t happen immediately. It takes a very close, intimate relationship with Jesus, spending time learning from Him and knowing His love ourselves, not through anyone else’s opinion or experience. It may be helpful to remember that even the demons “knew” Jesus, but they did not believe with a personal trust in Him, which is the kind of knowledge we’re talking about. Knowing Him and His character takes time, just as any relationship does, but it starts with faith that this long journey of learning and seeking to understand the love of Jesus is worth it.

3. Remember Jesus is King and you are not.

The more we learn about Jesus, the more beautiful, healing, and powerful we understand Jesus to be, it’s important to remain aware that we will come to identify ourselves with Him, because He identifies so closely and intimately with us. However, we must understand that there is potential in that process for pride to sneak in. Yes, we can identify with Jesus, we model our love and humility after Him. But we must remember who we are, under the authority and ownership of the King, Jesus Christ. Though He can and does work through us, we are not the judge, ever. At best, we may hope to be called His servants, a title of the highest honor for any mortal. As His, we are abundantly provided for, perfectly protected, and infinitely loved. In His care, there is no more need to look for satisfaction in the things that tempt us, because we know where true satisfaction is found, and we have found Him.

Where is our heart’s condition and motives? This is what Jesus looks at; He fully knows the true condition of our hearts. Come into His presence today. Allowing ourselves to be driven by pride is damaging to us in the long term, but He knows what it’s done to our hearts, and He seeks to fully heal and restore each and every one to wholeness as His beloved ones.

It is only in His presence that our heart is fully at home.

While only Jesus heals, there is responsibility on our part for our own heart’s condition. It is always God’s will to heal us of our pride and gently, patiently teach us the humility of Jesus, but He always takes our choices into account. Friends, I invite you to choose to know His presence with you in a fresh and deeply healing way. I invite you to the perspective that there is always reason to rejoice because of His presence and salvation. I invite you to stand in awe and wonder in the present Presence of the Lord, because there we are home.

Further Reading: The Prodigal God by Timothy Keller

“…I rejoice in your salvation.” (1 Samuel 2:1, ESV).

“But the Lord said to Samuel, ‘Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart.’” (1 Samuel 16:7, ESV).

Thank you for spending some of your time journeying with me. If you haven’t yet, please subscribe to Life with the King, and like & follow the Facebook page; it truly helps me continue writing this blog. Grace and peace.

May 16, 2020May 16, 2020

The Family of God

There was a time when I didn’t understand what the family of God meant, or why it was important. I believed that you could follow God in isolation from other believers. But this was a pride-comes-before-the-fall kind of belief.

We were never created to live in isolation from our family, from other believers in Jesus. We need each others’ help on our life journey. While solitude with God is a beautiful thing, and some people can enjoy it for years at a time, living in Western culture and in a capitalist society, we need a network of people to keep us accountable, help us when we can’t sustain our own connection with God, and pray for us (Hebrews 10:25).

Finding a family of believers to belong to is difficult.

It takes some serious consideration, prayer, and discernment. And it often takes quite a long time. It can be a frustrating and discouraging process to find people we can trust to walk alongside us. But we mustn’t give up. God provides for His children. Also, do you find it as amazing as I do that we are called children of God, and called part of God’s family?

We are counted as offspring (Romans 9:8).

“He came to his own, and his own people did not receive him. But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God, who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God” (John 1:11-13).

When we are new to following Jesus, we don’t always know what to look for. We might be attracted to churches who do a lot of outreach projects, host a lot of events, or offer a lot of resources. But primarily, we must look for people who love God and obey His commandments (1 John 5:2). That also means we must be willing to be and do the same.

No one is perfect at this except Jesus Himself, so we must have grace for ourselves and others in this area. But our hearts must be oriented and surrendered to our love for God. Finding a family like that is worth the wait.

Is a Church Home Necessary?

We aren’t meant to carry our crosses in isolation. We are meant to be part of the family of God, the body of Christ, to strengthen, encourage, and inspire us as we all strive to obey God’s commands. Our family is a blessing from God, and something to respect.

Whether you attend church or not, it is important that we have a community to be in dialogue with about God, and what He’s speaking and teaching us. It is also important to support and be supported in order to grow in our walk. If you don’t have one already, I’d encourage you to start a Bible study with others who are just as interested in learning about God as you are. Make it a regular part of your life. Churches can offer and arrange these, but in some seasons of life, it may be more useful to start your own with people you know. Always pray and seek God’s direction with this, the same as everything in your walk.

Obedience

Jesus chose obedience to God’s will, which meant ultimately surrendering everything for His love of God and us. Obedience is not something to be taken lightly. Obedience brings blessing; it actually unlocks the promises of God in our lives, because in obedience we are actively demonstrating our love for God.

“What good is it, my brothers, if someone says he has faith but does not have works? Can that faith save him?” (James 2:14).

Obedience can be at its most difficult when we are experiencing some type of suffering. As the Israelites in Exodus 5, we can be subjected to more suffering than we ever expected, even when our intentions are good and in service to God. What if, in those times of suffering, God is actually showing patience towards us as He did with the Israelites? What if as in that story He is actually allowing us more time to learn to trust Him with a lasting trust?

No matter how troubling the circumstances, the identity God has given us as His children does not change. No matter how evil the days, deliverance both has come and is coming! Take heart, our times of suffering teach us and form our character to be able to withstand every doubt to the very end. That is, after all, what we really need.

Remember that God is a good Father who loves us enough to give us what we need! It is exactly in these times that our family of believers becomes vital; we can lean on our family to keep us headed in the right direction when our faith is tested or when our suffering becomes overwhelming.

What it Means to Take Up Our Cross

Some days, the only reason we will take up our cross is because we want to obey God. We probably won’t feel like obeying God on most days. But it is a command. Thankfully, taking up our cross means more than just endurance of suffering. It means taking an active role in bringing life itself.

“And he said to all, “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it. For what does it profit a man if he gains the whole world and loses or forfeits himself?” (Luke 9:23-25).

God commands us to first deny ourselves, then to take up our cross, and finally, to follow Him. It must go in that order. The first step of denying the self, or the ego, is where we often get tripped up. We must die to ourselves. Okay, well that sounds pretty serious, right? Here’s the thing:

We cannot let our ego have its way while also following Jesus.

Later on in Luke’s gospel, he records Jesus saying it another way which I’ve found helpful regarding the act of denying oneself: “No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money” (Luke 16:13).

The motivation for our actions must be to either please God or chase money. In my reading, I also see “money” as power, status, and reputation. We cannot devote ourselves to both, according to Jesus.

“The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is safe.” (Proverbs 29:25).

Chasing power, or fearing men more than God, comes at the expense of our very selves. It “masters” us. It becomes an idol. And it is something that the “ego self” wants all the time.

There is a reason why the first commandment addresses idolatry.

It is a pervasive, hidden in plain sight sin. This is why taking up our cross has to be a daily practice. We are called to resist the temptations of our ego every single day. Jesus is saying in Luke 9:23-25 that we need to let the part of ourselves that wants power for our own gain die and choose to fear God. These are two paths that will always oppose each other.

Again, it takes effort on our part every day; it’s not just a one-time decision. Taking up our cross is a daily act of obedience that God asks of us. We show love for Him by obeying His command to pick up our cross daily and follow.

As we humble ourselves daily, we can take great hope in remembering the words of Peter, that “at the proper time he may exalt you . . . because he cares for you” (1 Peter 5:6-7).

Taking up our cross daily won’t happen unless we trust that God cares for us.

God’s care for us spurred Him to make a promise to us. He asks only that we trust that He fulfilled His promise in Jesus Christ. Taking up our cross is trusting God in action: loving God with all that we are, loving our neighbor as ourselves, following the Way of Jesus, and relying on His righteousness as our own. We have reason to rely and trust Him, but it also requires faith.

Our family of believers can serve as a wonderful reminder of God’s care and concern for us, and also help spur us on in faith. He often works through the compassionate care of our family members who can remind us of His love.

What’s in a name?

In the Biblical account, Moses is the first one who asks God what His personal name is. He was known as the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob by the Israelites, but Moses asked what he should tell Pharaoh God’s personal name was. Names were important because a name communicated something essential about the character of the god or person.

I think of the instances in the Bible when God gives people a new name: Abram (meaning exalted father) to Abraham (meaning father of a multitude), Jacob (meaning he takes by the heel or he cheats) to Israel (meaning he strives with God or God strives), Saul (Hebrew) to Paul (Roman). All of these names communicated a core part of each individual’s story in relation to God and their role in His greater story for humanity.

When asked for His name, God answered Moses:

I AM WHO I AM, in Hebrew, YHWH (Exodus 3:14).

This can also be translated as I WILL BE. In the context of God’s call to Moses to go to Pharaoh for His people, the name itself assures Moses and the Israelites that God will be with them. God’s presence with us is built into the name itself.

God IDENTIFIES Himself as related to us.

What an amazing thing! God truly is all about relationship with you and me, each and every soul He created. His presence with us is part of who He is; He identified this truth as His very essence in His name, YHWH!

Our family of believers can be a powerful reminder of this truth and many other truths that help us follow Jesus. If you struggle with family, know that it’s normal. You are not alone in feeling awkward about it sometimes, even when you’re happy with where you are. But remember that you are part of the family of God, it needs you just as much as you need it, and it is a great blessing in this life that is worth seeking out.

Paul wrote that believers are to “keep [our] eyes on those who live as we do” (Philippians 3:17). May we all gather as a family around the goodness and grace of YHWH, His promises, and the hope found in His name.

“By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and obey his commandments” (1 John 5:2).

“And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God” (Micah 6:8).

“Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world” (James 1:27).

January 24, 2020January 24, 2020

Dealing with Pride

“what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do” (Romans 7:15). Recently I found myself in a situation where I chose to sin. Of course, this was just one of the many times this has happened. Willfully sinning is really confusing, and more people need to talk about this; it messes with any feelings of pride in myself.

When I don’t feel right with myself, it’s difficult to keep hold of what’s true. My mind starts to crowd with these lies of how God is disappointed in me, is distant from me, and wants nothing to do with me anymore. How maybe my identity in Him was all just something I made up in my mind. This is really not okay.

In the midst of this pride-shattering moment, it became quite impossible for me to imagine that He could love me in spite of sin, and yet He does. In fact, He does just the same as if I had never sinned even once. Amazing grace, indeed. So amazing, in fact, that it can be difficult to accept at all.

Pride

I, like pretty much everybody, sinned against God simply because I wanted to do what I wanted to do. The sin of pride is and can be a wake-up call to look at and watch more carefully what goes on in our hearts and souls. My conscience was firing, my soul needed to get right with God again, and I had to confess my sin. I needed to repent all over again. After wrestling with the fact that I had followed sin instead of God, I realized that I was getting too comfortable. In my pride, my thought was actually that I was close to being past willful sin; but the Bible says that “no one may boast before Him” (1 Corinthians 1:29).

Even after I repented, I felt it wasn’t enough. I was still upset with myself. God had forgiven me, but I hadn’t been able to forgive myself. Friends, that is pride in a sneaky form. Instead of fully accepting God’s love and forgiveness, I was trying to shoulder the burden of sin myself. In withholding forgiveness for ourselves like I did, we actually think there’s something more we can do to make up for it. In not surrendering fully to God’s forgiveness, we try to take this sin of ours into our own hands. This is pride.

This is a complicated subject, so don’t mistake my meaning; what we do in our lives–does matter. Sin matters. One of the fruits of the Spirit is love. Jesus said, “By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another” (John 13:35). We are certainly meant to live in a way that follows the Way of Jesus, who was sinless. In James, actions are called “works”: “You see that a person is justified by works and not by faith alone” (James 2:24). Faith comes first, for actions flow from faith–the fruit of our lives, but what we do and what we choose, matters. However, nothing we do can make up for our sin.

Sin

Jesus paid it all for us. It is prideful to try to make up for it in any other way besides how He calls us to–to leave our life of sin.

Willful sins torture the conscience of those committed to the Way of Jesus. They still can creep up on us, as we are still here on the fallen earth. We still are made of dust. We have one foot here and one readied for the age to come. We have been set free from sin by Jesus, but at any moment we can choose to step outside God’s will to do our own will and sin against Him.

Sometimes the only way to know what sin is, is because of what the Bible says. My own thoughts and feelings change constantly. My moral compass was shattered at the Fall. It’s hard to know the Truth about many things, and it can appear as though every person has their own version of truth. But actually this cultural catchphrase “live your truth” or “follow your truth” is saying that everyone has their own beliefs about what the truth is. Beliefs do not change the Truth.

Of course, what we believe is important; for more on that see my post How Belief is Our Most Powerful Tool. But I am saying that believing something doesn’t make it so.

Hope for self-hate

I debated whether to mention self-hate, but just like willful sin, I feel that it needs to be addressed if we’re talking about a life lived in freedom. Self hate; that point at which I mess up and I’m just disgusted with myself and how miserably I failed to fear God…yep, that was my week. Self-hate is a very real thing and I wanted to share that I experience this because I don’t think I’m the only one. I’m here to say that there is still hope, even in a place of self-hate.

Yes, we sin. But that just gives us another opportunity to talk to God. Another reason to repent, to put our faith in God all over again, and process what went wrong with Him. To let Him make something good grow in us that maybe wasn’t developed yet. Or even to weed out something that no longer needs to be there. He gives us all fresh opportunities to work through our sins with Him, confess them, and let them go thanks to Jesus’ sacrifice. Praise God that “his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning…” (Lamentations 3:22-23). Yes, you will sin, but there is always mercy available to you in Christ Jesus our King. There is hope because “a person is not justified by works of the law but through faith in Jesus Christ” (Galatians 2:16). Sin no longer has the last word over us, because Christ made a way.

Where our hearts lie can be seen through the fruit of our lives, but there is nothing you can do to separate you from the love of God (Romans 38:38-39). He longs to be chosen by us. He longs to be allowed into our hearts. He makes all things new (Revelation 12:5). Even sin. Even self-hate. Even the pride we struggle to let go of.

Humility

God is working on my ego in this, my latest particular experience with sin. Ironically, this is actually something I asked Him to do; I prayed that I wanted my ego to be eliminated, kaput, bye-bye. Be careful what you pray for! I believe that my failed test is helping my prayer to be answered. This experience exposed my pride and revealed beyond a doubt that I am no better than anyone else. That it’s all Him, it’s none of me. No amount of hard work, self-determination, sense of righteousness, or even how close I “felt” to God lately makes me a good person in the slightest. Only God is Good (Mark 10:18; Luke 18:19). None of that stuff can save me or you from sin. Only Jesus can do that, so that no one may boast. Only Jesus.

Thanks be to God.

If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness (2 Corinthians 11:30).

May I never boast except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, through which the world has been crucified to me, and I to the world (Galatians 6:14).