The December Goal

I am amazed when I look back on how much God has done in the last year. Today I was reminded that the focus of my attention is too often on the “things” that I think will make my life better. Things like peace and joy are things that I often pray to experience, as I imagine they themselves would improve my own life. But I was convicted today that actually, the goal isn’t to experience the peace or the joy, but God Himself.

What if God Himself was our goal? What if we yearned for His Presence more than we yearn for the fruits of the spirit? Friends, God is the goal. Knowing God, being with Him in worship and prayer, and experiencing life in relationship with Him is just starting to describe the level of intimacy with Him that He desires to have with each one of us. This relational experience of God goes far beyond improving life—it IS life.

2025 has been a year of a lot of change for me. I’ve changed my vision for the future, expectations, rhythm of life, and even church. It’s been very difficult to adapt and yet wonderfully positive and life-giving. It’s been a challenging year of learning how to truly come to Jesus for rest (Matthew 11:28). “Surrender” has been the key word of my year. I would be led back to it no matter what the situation was or the state of my heart. I had to surrender control to God in order to move forward, time and time again. It was new, it was difficult, it was harder than it seemed and not what I thought it meant when I was newer in my faith. And it’s something I’ll be doing for the rest of my life. Surrender is so important to having a relational experience of God; it made up a lot of our back-and-forth conversations in 2025. I had to stop grasping at surrender; instead I had to let go.

This year, I’ve developed the perspective that letting go is the most courageous thing someone can do in their life. It’s also a tangible, practical way of trusting God instead of relying on self. But letting go isn’t weak or lazy, not at all. It’s powerful. It’s the way of true power and abundant life. Paul wrote, “for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control” (2 Timothy 1:7). Paul was one who God chose to let go of his life of Jewish religious prestige and share the message of Jesus with many parts of the world that hadn’t heard it yet. Paul (then Saul) experienced Jesus in a way that caused him to repent, and he let go of the life he was living. He trusted the path that Jesus set him on instead (Acts 9:6 & 9:17-20). By God’s gracious love, we are able to do the same in our own lives today.

God Himself—seeking Him, living in His Presence, and being in His will out of reverence and trust in Him—that is what I’m calling the December goal. It’s the goal that can’t wait until January when everyone remembers to make life improvement lists. The December goal is the only goal we need to focus on, every day. It’s the only one we need, the life itself, yet it so easily can get overlooked, somehow. Seeking God, rather than His gifts, is the goal I want to have today and every day. Jesus said, “But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you” (Matthew 6:33). Gifts will follow, and can’t be the focus when we follow God wholeheartedly. Like the kingdom of heaven (Matthew 13:44), Jesus is worth all we have. In Him is the only place to find everything we yearn for. Jesus deserves it all, He gave it all for us.

If you’re reading this, and you haven’t surrendered to Jesus, don’t wait until January 1st. Don’t wait until tomorrow. It’s something that right here and now, in December, will be the only thing that truly, eternally, satisfies your soul. We were each made for a special, unique relationship with Him; let go of anything holding you back and give Him the control of your life. It’s hard, but don’t give up! Jesus is waiting, right now, to hear from you. Tell Him your struggles, your laments, your hopes, and expectations. He longs to hear your heart. He is worth your all.

Behold, the virgin shall conceive and bear a son, and they shall call his name Immanuel” (which means, God with us)” (Matthew 1:23).

Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you” (Matthew 7:7).

You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart” (Jeremiah 29:13).

Thank you for spending some of your time journeying with me. If you haven’t yet, please subscribe to Life with the King, and like & follow the Facebook page; it truly helps me continue writing this blog. Grace and peace.

A Closer Look at God’s Forgiveness

Do we really need to forgive ourselves?  

I’ve been seriously wrestling with this question for five years. I’ve fervently tried, but I was never able to feel settled with the statement that I had “forgiven myself.” 

The thing is, I knew I hadn’t fully. I wasn’t even sure I could. But I couldn’t ignore the fact that I am dust and just couldn’t shake the truth that without God’s grace through Jesus I am unforgivable, flawed, and hopelessly sinful. That is what makes God’s grace and Jesus’ sacrifice for us so incredibly difficult to comprehend. Offering grace to ourselves is not always an easy task, even on our best days. 

Lately I’ve been working very hard on accepting the truth, even if it’s not pretty or what I or others would want to hear. Jesus had to come and forgive me; I can’t forgive myself on my own. Without His grace (upon grace…) I am not gracious enough toward myself to forgive fully. I can’t pardon myself from the sins I’ve committed or fix my fallen nature. I can’t absolve myself of guilt. Only Jesus can do that.  

Forgiving ourselves is not done on our own strength, it’s about leaning on the forgiveness Jesus already offers to us.

I can’t shake the truth that I desperately need Jesus’ forgiveness. It is His forgiveness that allows me to forgive others, and myself. We are not meant to live under the weight of heavy guilt; instead, we are meant to live freely and lightly (Matthew 11:30). As He calls us to follow Him, He invites us to come to Him and accept the forgiveness He has for us. 

In accepting His forgiveness, we believe the unbelievable, that what God says really is true, and that Jesus’ work on the cross really was enough. We are made in His image, so we all have the capacity to forgive, but Jesus teaches us how to do this. Jesus enables us to forgive, wholly and truly, through and through.   

Through His amazing grace, we may extend complete grace to ourselves and others.

We can start to see ourselves through His eyes when we accept His forgiveness. And we might need to choose to accept it several times every day! Just as we have to choose to take up our cross daily, we must also choose to accept His forgiveness as we continue to make mistakes, doubt our own faith, or struggle to show grace to ourselves and others. 

Forgiveness is a choice God made in relation to us. We do not have to do anything to earn it, a strange feeling in our world where so much must be earned. Accepting God’s choice to forgive us despite what we may feel about ourselves at any given moment isn’t always so easy. (I mean, did He see what I did? If I’m disgusted in me, then surely He is, right?) Wrong. He loves and forgives us unconditionally. And He knew that you were going to do whatever it is you did, but that doesn’t change a thing. 

Jesus already paid the full price for our forgiveness. As we believe this, the Holy Spirit lives in us and loves us as part of His own family. This is the fact; feelings that keep us from believing we can be forgiven are not fact.  

It’s okay to give your feelings time to catch up with facts. 

It is not okay, however, to let feelings blind you to facts. The facts are that God loves you, Jesus paid the price for you, and that you are forgiven and free in Him. How amazing that we do not have to do anything more than believe to receive His forgiveness! And even more than this, His forgiveness empowers us to forgive to greater depths than we ever could on our own strength.                  

Yet, we are ever-tempted to give in to the false feelings that are not of God, of guilt and shame. For some of us, these feelings might be a comfortable place to be. But these feelings were never meant to linger and we were never meant to dwell among them. Jesus said, “...it is necessary that temptations come…” (Matthew 18:7). Temptations and disobedience will happen, but it doesn’t erase what God has done or who we are in Him at all. Guilt and shame must be dealt with yet moved through, for we are meant to dwell in Jesus’ freedom. 

When God leads us through temptations to the other side, He shows us who He is, for He walks with us the whole way.

Not only am I aware that I am dust, but God is aware too (Psalm 103:14), and He has mercy for that. He knows we will be tempted to choose not to believe the facts and go with our feelings. 

In fact, God uses even these temptations for His glory, “For God has bound everyone over to disobedience so that he may have mercy on them all” (Romans 11:32). He gives us no reason to fear. He knows we need Him, and He forgives us for being human.   

It’s okay to accept God’s forgiveness.  

In reference to Romans 8:33, the ESV Study Bible notes, “Satan, their enemies, or even their own consciences may bring charges against God’s elect, but those who have come to faith in Christ will never be found guilty, for God declares them to be right before all the world at the divine tribunal.”

This means we will face charges in our own thoughts and consciences, and it’s not a question of if but when–this will happen. It does not change the fact that Jesus Christ cleared us of our charges and forgave us. 

Asking God to forgive us, and believing He does, is enough.  

Paul wrote, “For we maintain that a person is justified by faith apart from the works of the law (Romans 3:28). We do not have to work and do extra to earn forgiveness. Forgiveness is not earned, it is given. He asks us to have faith in Him; His forgiveness for us doesn’t depend on our striving or achieving. 

We don’t have to strive to earn freedom from guilt, instead, we are invited to have faith that we are forgiven. 

In Matthew, it says, “with God all things are possible” (19:26). As we struggle with forgiving ourselves, let us take heart in knowing that we can rest because of who Jesus is, what He has done, and what He, even now, is doing on our behalf; “Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us” (Romans 8:34). 

Not only has he paid the price for our forgiveness, but He continually works on our behalf; we have no need to strive because of Him.

May we let it all rest in Jesus. 

“God is for us, so who can be against us” (Romans 8:31)?

Thank you for spending some of your time journeying with me. If you haven’t yet, please subscribe to the blog, it helps me continue writing about Life with the King. Grace and peace.