I can think of many instances throughout life in which I’ve been impatient. I’ve been impatient to make friends at a new school, to succeed in a new job, and to just get to the next place I’m dreaming of.

How many times have we all believed that to get somewhere, we were the ones who would have to make it happen? This is common advice. But is that actually the best advice to follow?

While I am absolutely an advocate of taking personal responsibility for our lives, I find this motivating, feel-good piece of advice dangerous because it can easily lead people farther off the path of patience and into a state of hurry, striving, and impatience. That state of impatience seems to be preferred over the alternative state of feeling dissatisfied with the present condition of our lives.

Have you ever been so eager about something you expected for your future that you tried to rush ahead before you were ready? Abraham did that too. Or maybe you spent months or years not knowing what you were supposed to do with your life? Moses could relate. Both situations are a real test of patience.

Humans are meant to progress and grow, and when we aren’t doing so, it can drive us to go too far or do things that we might later regret. At least the impatient option provides the feeling of moving forward, right? But what if there was another state to choose from–a third option?

There is purpose in the here and now, no matter how you feel.

Here and now is all we ever have, but it can be difficult to think of life that way. In fact, as humans we are uniquely wired to expect the future to always be there.

What is God teaching us in the discomfort, whether feeling impatient or stuck? It is important to pay attention to our feelings here, they are a warning sign that we are getting too far away from God’s best for us. We must learn how to avoid the temptation of rushing ahead of God’s will for our lives. When we don’t know what our purpose is, it can be easy to get filled with our own ideas about what’s best and run ahead. Often in the wrong direction entirely.

To change this cycle, to factor God’s purpose into the equation, requires a shift in belief that goes against the world’s view:

Our life is not something that “we make happen,” but instead something that God makes happen.

Some of us have already been given a glimpse as to what that life is going to look like in the future, and some of us don’t know until after we’ve already gotten started. But God is preparing us all for a life of deep meaning and purpose, doing the work He has uniquely designed for us. He’ll lead us to do incredible work in His name that will last to the New Earth.

But are we patient enough to wait for His timing for this beautiful vision? Patient enough to wait for our maturity to catch up with a life that goes beyond our biggest dreams? Thinking back on my own life and how many times God has been willing to accept me back after running ahead of His will simply baffles me. God is patient, even when we aren’t.

The apostle Peter provides insight into the virtue of patience as a characteristic of God: “He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance” (2 Peter 3:9).

No matter where we are, impulsive or directionless, God is patient with us.

We can take reassurance in that. He knows it takes time to grow. He knows we need time to mature and uncover our gifts and develop our strengths. When we are ready, no earlier and no later, but at exactly the right moment, God will then make a way for the purpose He has for us. We don’t have to strive to make this happen ourselves. In fact, even trying distracts us from the here and now moment that is meant to serve our greater purpose.

Each and every one of us is called to the same initial purpose: to repent. For a discussion on repentance, click here. We need only to be willing. To repent opens doors of possibility. God has plans for our lives after repentance, plans that will go beyond everything we could ask for or imagine. In His great mercy, God is patient with us, allowing us the time we need to repent, grow, and meet His call.

God’s patience is a sign of salvation! (2 Peter 3:15).

“Okay that sounds great,” you might be thinking, “God’s patience is overwhelmingly merciful and loving, but real talk, how can I myself be patient right here and now when here and now is so tough?” I hear you. How can we develop this fruit of the Spirit?

Colossians 3 says that in Christ we have been brought to fullness, that God made you alive in Christ, and canceled our condemnation. This frees us to live a life of patience. Because God has given abundant patience to us, we in turn are equipped by Him to be patient with how our lives unfold, with ourselves, and with others. The key is keeping our eyes fixed on Him and not on our pain. We must intentionally stay inspired by Him and in tune with the ways He is working.

We must not run ahead, but walk alongside Him.

“Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience,” (Colossians 3:12).

Being chosen by God and loved by Him gives us every reason to be patient! We have no need to hurry through our lives any longer. We no longer have to be subject to the constant striving for more in this world, but instead to keep pace with God.

The apostle Paul wrote, “And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all” (1 Thessalonians 5:14). We are to have grace and show patience toward people when they show their humanity, their weaknesses. And sometimes, maybe even most of the time, we’ll need to show patience to ourselves too.

Paul was one of the most patient people, maybe ever. Imprisoned for long periods, he patiently waited out his sentence. He wrote, “But I received mercy for this reason, that in me, as the foremost, Jesus Christ might display his perfect patience as an example to those who were to believe in him for eternal life” (1 Timothy 1:16). We see in Paul’s life:

Faith leads to passionate patience.

It all starts with the faith and repentance of the sinner; that’s every one of us, me and you. We must die to this world and its toxic values to be resurrected in Christ. The resurrection of our souls in Christ gives way to a life in which God is in control, a life in which we are transformed into a new creation, and held in perfect patience as we walk beside Him.

If something is holding you back from stepping into the patience that God freely gives us all in Christ, please reach out, I’d love to pray for you.

It’s okay to stop trying to earn what God has already given us.

“Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer” (Romans 12:12).

“And the Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil,” (2 Timothy 2:24).

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,” (Galatians 5:22).

Further suggested reading:

Garden City by John Mark Comer

The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry by John Mark Comer

To Hell with the Hustle by Jefferson Bethke

Honestly, I haven’t been in a very thankful mood lately, even though Thanksgiving was just last week. For me, Thanksgiving kicks off the holiday season, which tends to come with a lot of responsibilities. All of a sudden, my mind is always on the next thing and in that state it’s difficult to appreciate what I already have, or what it is I’ve been able to accomplish. Instead, I tend to rush right into the next thing without a pause to enjoy the moment, or the people around me.

Also, maybe you’re like me and right around Thanksgiving you start taking inventory of the year and your life in general. A new year isn’t far ahead, and the days are short–and broodingly dark. Perhaps you start thinking about how your year has gone and the highs and the lows you’ve experienced. You start the annual process of pinpointing what you’re most thankful for and try to focus on the positive.

This Thanksgiving, with not just a new year but a new decade approaching, it was just hard for me to get into a grateful mood. I kept thinking about all the things I have left to do before the new year starts. Anxiety and overwhelm set in and wouldn’t budge. Meanwhile I had about 20 things on my to-do list waiting.

Even so, I thought, “What is wrong with me? Why am I feeling like such a grinch; I mean it’s not even Christmas time yet?”

My attitude made me–not really ungrateful–but calculated and choreographed, generally stressed and distracted. Dare I say it but I believe it’s impossible to enjoy the holiday or to love people around us in this state. Thankfully (pun intended), there is a better way. In hindsight, I discovered there are three things I could have prioritized above all the items on my to-do list that could have helped to make this holiday better and less stressful. I wanted to share these things with you hoping that they might help make the holidays still yet to come a little brighter.

1. Being present requires slowing down.

This sounds so simple, and it is. But it’s difficult to put into practice, especially in a busy season like the holiday season. We all want to be present. We all want to love the people around us well. We all want to enjoy the moments we have. However, the first step to doing that is to actually slow down. So, instead of tackling the next thing on my to-do list with the mindset of just getting to the “good part” of being done, I could have stopped to appreciate what I had already accomplished. Given myself a high five. Made some tea and enjoyed the moment for just 10 minutes. Then, back in touch with the present, maybe then I could start on that next line item. The trick though is to focus on what’s good right now. How often do we do this in the rest of the year? Maybe it’s fairly easy for most of my enneagram type 1s out there, but for me, it’s a struggle to stay present. Friends, it’s worth whatever it takes for you to slow down so that being present is possible.

2. Prayer is more important than preparation.

Though preparation for the holiday–cooking, cleaning, gift buying and wrapping, card sending, shopping, etc. can easily take top importance in our minds, prayer can’t be an afterthought. I mean, it can, but that’s what we want to avoid. Prayer often gets bumped down to the very end of the day when I’m too tired to have an honest, healing, helpful conversation with God. This happened to me big time this Thanksgiving; full disclosure. I tried to just push through and get to the part where I could enjoy the holiday, only to find I was so stressed and emotions had been so bottled up, that I struggled to enjoy it. And the worst part was that God felt far away, because I hadn’t been prioritizing prayer. Friends, prayer is the most important thing, in every season. All the preparation in the world, the best food, the best gifts, the cleanest house–it doesn’t mean anything. Connecting with God is everything. Prayer can give rest to a weary soul, and can restore a hurried heart. All of life flows from prayer. Don’t bump prayer for anything else; it’s the lifeline we need.

3. There are consequences for going on your own strength.

Jeremiah warns that there are consequences for not turning to the Lord, and His will. I didn’t go on my own strength intentionally; it just happened. I pressed forward in what seemingly needed to be done. Why did I need to pray about going to the market to buy green beans? Oh, but I did ya’ll. Trying to get through on my own strength had a tremendous cost. One day instead of doing what I had planned, I was feeling so down and dark emotionally from the weight of obligation that all I could do was go find a quiet place outdoors to walk and talk to God. I had no strength left anymore to go on my own. There was a cost, a consequence, of not turning to the Lord first. There is significance in giving the Lord everything in our lives, down to the last green bean. Instead of waiting for a meltdown, dealing with life could have been easier if I had given each task over to the Lord in prayer before proceeding. Also I could have given them to God before saying yes to them in the first place. Did I really need to be doing this or that thing? Was it truly my job to do? Instead of asking these things, I had tried to just go forward and handle everything on my own. God warned me of the consequences when I read the passage from Jeremiah a couple of weeks ago. But I didn’t truly get it until after my walk and talk with God. It was so obvious, too; an, “Oh, that’s what He was talking about!” moment. Hindsight–it’s a great teacher.

Friends, for this holiday and all those to come, may we all slow down and walk at the pace Jesus modeled for us–taking the time to truly see one another, choosing what is best, and being present with Him as He is present with us.

Luke 10:40-42: “But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, ‘Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!’

‘Martha, Martha,’ the Lord answered, ‘you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.’”

Further suggested reading: Garden City by John Mark Comer; The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry by John Mark Comer; To Hell with the Hustle by Jefferson Bethke

Tag: Hustle

Purpose in Patience